~ Acknowledgement ~
You have taught me a lot since the day I know you. I’ve learned many things from you. When first I came to KL, I never thought of learn to cook. And I don’t even know “sharing is caring”. I learned all this from you! After I had started and tried to cook some dishes, the first thing came to my mind was, I must learn to cook delicious ‘tau fu’ for my grandparents especially my grandma after I back to my hometown. Although it’s too late, I unable to cook for my grandma, but at least I do learn how to cook. Although my food taste badly sometimes, but you still will finish it and able to give me some feedback as referent to improve my cooking skill every time.
Before I came to KL, I always thought of leaving my family to some other places will lead to happier life. But I'm wrong! I’ve learned from you that family is always comes first. Because no matter what happen, family members will always be with you and support you. Actually sometimes, I’m quite envy you that you’ve such harmony and happy family. My family become more harmony after I study in KL. Although I don’t know what’s the actual reason but I’m happy to see so. I’ve also learned from you that we’ve the right to voice out our dissatisfaction and to improve the relationships between our family members.
All I want to say is thank you very much! Thanks for everything! You’ve taught me a lot of things. And I apologize that I’m quite annoying sometimes. And sorry for always troubling you. May be I’m not a good friend all this while. I won’t be trouble or ‘fan’ you anymore. Anyway, thanks for everything! You’re always a good friend of mine! =)
Friday, April 25, 2008
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
~ DREAM ~
Normally the 2nd dream will not connect with the 1st dream. But this time my both dream were slightly connected to each other. I dream if my grandma twice! Finally, my dreams come true!
In my 1st dream, I was having a walk with my grandma at a beach at night. Suddenly, we saw a mad dog that running around and chasing people. Everyone was running away for their life. Soon, the mad dog ran towards my grandma and bites her hand. So her hand was injured. Then, I cried. But my mum said, “What for you cry? Your grandma had died”. This is the part where I’m still confused whether that is my grandma or not. But I really saw my grandma’s hand was injured and was bleeding in the dream.
The 2nd dream was located at my grandpa’s house. Some of my cousins, aunts & uncles and I were there. We were having some conversation. After that, don’t know who mentioned about play cards or mahjong. So, my grandma volunteers to teach us to play cards or mahjong. Then, I woke up!
I wonder will I dream my grandma again tonight after I sleep? Will the dream continue with my 2nd dream? But one thing for sure, if I score my exam with flying colors, I’ll sure show it to my grandma! I LOVE YOU, GRANDMA! And I MISS YOU SO MUCH!
Normally the 2nd dream will not connect with the 1st dream. But this time my both dream were slightly connected to each other. I dream if my grandma twice! Finally, my dreams come true!
In my 1st dream, I was having a walk with my grandma at a beach at night. Suddenly, we saw a mad dog that running around and chasing people. Everyone was running away for their life. Soon, the mad dog ran towards my grandma and bites her hand. So her hand was injured. Then, I cried. But my mum said, “What for you cry? Your grandma had died”. This is the part where I’m still confused whether that is my grandma or not. But I really saw my grandma’s hand was injured and was bleeding in the dream.
The 2nd dream was located at my grandpa’s house. Some of my cousins, aunts & uncles and I were there. We were having some conversation. After that, don’t know who mentioned about play cards or mahjong. So, my grandma volunteers to teach us to play cards or mahjong. Then, I woke up!
I wonder will I dream my grandma again tonight after I sleep? Will the dream continue with my 2nd dream? But one thing for sure, if I score my exam with flying colors, I’ll sure show it to my grandma! I LOVE YOU, GRANDMA! And I MISS YOU SO MUCH!
Monday, April 21, 2008
~ My FeeLiNGs ~
Three weeks had passed after my grandma had passed away. The passage “TAU FU” is the only and last passage in my blog that I wrote regarding my grandma a few years ago before she get stroke last year. Although there’s many grammatical error, but I won’t correct it. If I correct it, it may change the feel of the whole passage. The passage is very valuable and priceless for me. I won’t get to write such passage anymore! No more in my life!
The things I worry all the while happened after my grandma passed away. Which was I unable to let go of her. I spend a week to put down and let go of her. On that week, I did many things which I never do before and was like another me. I cried the whole day during the funeral and I even will get emotion whenever mentioned about my grandma. Many things had happened when I was not in college although only for two days. On Friday, I felt very lost after my class at 4p.m. I didn’t even know where to go. Then I walked to the college bus stop and sat there for some time. After that, I decided to go to watch movie alone. My first thought was watched comedy so that I can laugh. Soon, I watched two movies continuously. All those never happen in my life before!
On Saturday was my grandma’s 7th day. I purposely drunk myself so that I’m able to dream my grandma and to forget all those unhappy stuffs. I really did so but I don’t know whether I was drunk or not. My friends also shocked to hear so. After that day, I started to accept the fact and let go of my grandma. But I hate every Saturday 2.++ am which is the time my grandma passed away. It will be my 2nd unforgettable memory in my life. It’s hard to forget that moment. To be honest, I still will cry every Saturday 2.++ am once it refresh back in my mind. I really miss my grandma so much!
After I studied in KL, I seldom called back. The last time I talked to my grandma on phone was the mid of my first semester before she get stroke on September 2007. Actually I planned to cook for her during my break in 1st semester. But it was too late! She get stroke in a sudden and many things had started to change. So, just do whatever you feel like doing before it’s too late! And appreciate every moment you’re having now! You may not know what will happen in the next second! Enjoy your life and always be happy! After all, I’ll appreciate my every moment with my grandpa and everyone now.
Three weeks had passed after my grandma had passed away. The passage “TAU FU” is the only and last passage in my blog that I wrote regarding my grandma a few years ago before she get stroke last year. Although there’s many grammatical error, but I won’t correct it. If I correct it, it may change the feel of the whole passage. The passage is very valuable and priceless for me. I won’t get to write such passage anymore! No more in my life!
The things I worry all the while happened after my grandma passed away. Which was I unable to let go of her. I spend a week to put down and let go of her. On that week, I did many things which I never do before and was like another me. I cried the whole day during the funeral and I even will get emotion whenever mentioned about my grandma. Many things had happened when I was not in college although only for two days. On Friday, I felt very lost after my class at 4p.m. I didn’t even know where to go. Then I walked to the college bus stop and sat there for some time. After that, I decided to go to watch movie alone. My first thought was watched comedy so that I can laugh. Soon, I watched two movies continuously. All those never happen in my life before!
On Saturday was my grandma’s 7th day. I purposely drunk myself so that I’m able to dream my grandma and to forget all those unhappy stuffs. I really did so but I don’t know whether I was drunk or not. My friends also shocked to hear so. After that day, I started to accept the fact and let go of my grandma. But I hate every Saturday 2.++ am which is the time my grandma passed away. It will be my 2nd unforgettable memory in my life. It’s hard to forget that moment. To be honest, I still will cry every Saturday 2.++ am once it refresh back in my mind. I really miss my grandma so much!
After I studied in KL, I seldom called back. The last time I talked to my grandma on phone was the mid of my first semester before she get stroke on September 2007. Actually I planned to cook for her during my break in 1st semester. But it was too late! She get stroke in a sudden and many things had started to change. So, just do whatever you feel like doing before it’s too late! And appreciate every moment you’re having now! You may not know what will happen in the next second! Enjoy your life and always be happy! After all, I’ll appreciate my every moment with my grandpa and everyone now.
Sunday, April 06, 2008
~ LasT WeeK's ToDaY ~
Last week’s today brought many changes. I still remember my cousins and I were staying awake at the living room. Because was our turn (every Friday night) to take care of my grandma. I was too sleepy so I went into the room to sleep at 2am. But two of my cousins still watching “Flood” at the living room. Once my cousin brother didn’t hear any sound from my grandma, he went to see awhile but she’s still breathing. Later, my aunty came down to see, she noticed that my grandma heart beat had stopped.
Suddenly, I was woken up by my cousin sister at around 2.30am. I was quite blur at that time and didn’t know what’s happening. So, I just woke up and walked out to the living room. Then, my aunt suddenly asked me to touch my grandma’s chest to make sure that my grandma’s heart beat had stopped. I put my hand on her chest and I really can’t feel anything which means her heart beat had stopped and died peacefully. That’s the moment many things started to change. Then, everyone started to pray for my grandma by sitting around her. We prayed 8 hours continuously and we’re not allowed to touch her in between the 8 hours.
At first, I’m still able to control my feeling but sooner or later I still burst into tears. I refresh back everything about my grandma and my tears kept like a water pipe non-stop flow out the water. Actually I was told not to cry in front of my grandma because scare that she’ll unable to let go us and go peacefully. My grandpa didn’t even know my grandma had passed away. We only told him after the 8 hours pray because scare he’ll touch my grandma after tell him. He’s so sad and angry and kept scolding us why don’t we tell him earlier. My uncles console him. He cried and went into the living room to touch my grandma before other people make up for my grandma and cover her with a cloth. After that, she was carried out and put it into a coffin and the funeral held at outside the house for 5 days.
Last week’s today brought many changes. I still remember my cousins and I were staying awake at the living room. Because was our turn (every Friday night) to take care of my grandma. I was too sleepy so I went into the room to sleep at 2am. But two of my cousins still watching “Flood” at the living room. Once my cousin brother didn’t hear any sound from my grandma, he went to see awhile but she’s still breathing. Later, my aunty came down to see, she noticed that my grandma heart beat had stopped.
Suddenly, I was woken up by my cousin sister at around 2.30am. I was quite blur at that time and didn’t know what’s happening. So, I just woke up and walked out to the living room. Then, my aunt suddenly asked me to touch my grandma’s chest to make sure that my grandma’s heart beat had stopped. I put my hand on her chest and I really can’t feel anything which means her heart beat had stopped and died peacefully. That’s the moment many things started to change. Then, everyone started to pray for my grandma by sitting around her. We prayed 8 hours continuously and we’re not allowed to touch her in between the 8 hours.
At first, I’m still able to control my feeling but sooner or later I still burst into tears. I refresh back everything about my grandma and my tears kept like a water pipe non-stop flow out the water. Actually I was told not to cry in front of my grandma because scare that she’ll unable to let go us and go peacefully. My grandpa didn’t even know my grandma had passed away. We only told him after the 8 hours pray because scare he’ll touch my grandma after tell him. He’s so sad and angry and kept scolding us why don’t we tell him earlier. My uncles console him. He cried and went into the living room to touch my grandma before other people make up for my grandma and cover her with a cloth. After that, she was carried out and put it into a coffin and the funeral held at outside the house for 5 days.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
~ EnD a FrIEndShIP ~
Have you ever think of ending a friendship with anyone? To be honest, I did think of it before. It’s very stupid for me to think so. Furthermore, I even thought of I’ll be more happy if I end the friendship with my friend. But I might be loosing 2 friends at once if I do so. I’m so selfish and never think of what they think. That’s not me! Oh my god, I must be crazy and out of my mind!
What makes me think of ending the friendship? It may be because there’s something that I still can’t accept it. May be I can accept it when time passes. But I think it might take a very long time for me to accept it. I understand that we had gone through many things before. I appreciate it so much! May be you all may think that I’m ‘small gas’. But have you all thought of it deeply by standing at my side. Then, you all will know how I feel of the upset and disappointment. I don’t think I’ll continue to type this passage anymore because it may causes some troubles or conflicts if I continue it. I don’t hope to see so happen!
Actually is extremely hard to end a friendship with anyone especially your good friend. May be I won’t ask for help or anything anymore. I’ll always try my best to help myself. I’ll protect myself from getting sad and hurt. Because I want to be the cheerful me and no longer sad anymore. My tears is going to dry up if I keep crying everyday and is just like ‘one liter of tears’. Because I’ve so many problems in this semester that causes the tears can’t stop flowing.
Do you think that I want to be so? No! I was affected by the surrounding, by it happens around me every moment. Disappointed and sadness are also apart of it that are also affecting me. May be one day you all may found out that I’m no longer that person you all anymore.
Have you ever think of ending a friendship with anyone? To be honest, I did think of it before. It’s very stupid for me to think so. Furthermore, I even thought of I’ll be more happy if I end the friendship with my friend. But I might be loosing 2 friends at once if I do so. I’m so selfish and never think of what they think. That’s not me! Oh my god, I must be crazy and out of my mind!
What makes me think of ending the friendship? It may be because there’s something that I still can’t accept it. May be I can accept it when time passes. But I think it might take a very long time for me to accept it. I understand that we had gone through many things before. I appreciate it so much! May be you all may think that I’m ‘small gas’. But have you all thought of it deeply by standing at my side. Then, you all will know how I feel of the upset and disappointment. I don’t think I’ll continue to type this passage anymore because it may causes some troubles or conflicts if I continue it. I don’t hope to see so happen!
Actually is extremely hard to end a friendship with anyone especially your good friend. May be I won’t ask for help or anything anymore. I’ll always try my best to help myself. I’ll protect myself from getting sad and hurt. Because I want to be the cheerful me and no longer sad anymore. My tears is going to dry up if I keep crying everyday and is just like ‘one liter of tears’. Because I’ve so many problems in this semester that causes the tears can’t stop flowing.
Do you think that I want to be so? No! I was affected by the surrounding, by it happens around me every moment. Disappointed and sadness are also apart of it that are also affecting me. May be one day you all may found out that I’m no longer that person you all anymore.
Saturday, March 08, 2008
~ SuRRenDeR ~
Finally, I loose! I loose to myself! I surrender! I always thought that I can live alone but really can’t. For people like me, sure won’t feel lonely because I always make friends everywhere. But when I feel sad and down that time, there’s no one to console me, not even one of them. When I really need help or a friend to accompany me or console me, but no! No one will! I always thought that I’m a very tough girl that can face all the problems and settle everything just by my own because I don’t want others to worry or trouble others. To be honest, sometimes is really very tiring being so tough.
Oh God, please bring her along with you to heaven. Please let her leave peacefully and beautifully. That’s what my grandma hopes for. Pleas don’t let her suffer anymore. When she’s suffering, not only she feels the pain but everyone around her too. I believe that I sure will cry when she leaves but I willing to let her go. I don’t want to see her suffer anymore.
Don’t worry grandma! Even if nobody always beside me to console me after you leaves, I believe I sure can overcome it by myself. Although is hard and it needs time, but time will rove everything. So, you may go peacefully anytime. I love you forever!
Finally, I loose! I loose to myself! I surrender! I always thought that I can live alone but really can’t. For people like me, sure won’t feel lonely because I always make friends everywhere. But when I feel sad and down that time, there’s no one to console me, not even one of them. When I really need help or a friend to accompany me or console me, but no! No one will! I always thought that I’m a very tough girl that can face all the problems and settle everything just by my own because I don’t want others to worry or trouble others. To be honest, sometimes is really very tiring being so tough.
Oh God, please bring her along with you to heaven. Please let her leave peacefully and beautifully. That’s what my grandma hopes for. Pleas don’t let her suffer anymore. When she’s suffering, not only she feels the pain but everyone around her too. I believe that I sure will cry when she leaves but I willing to let her go. I don’t want to see her suffer anymore.
Don’t worry grandma! Even if nobody always beside me to console me after you leaves, I believe I sure can overcome it by myself. Although is hard and it needs time, but time will rove everything. So, you may go peacefully anytime. I love you forever!
Tuesday, March 04, 2008
~ The First Day of School and my Results ~
Actually there’s nothing special with my first day of school. I was shocked to hear the news this early in the morning. There were 85% of students fail their FOA. How could it be? We’re accounting students and so many of them fail? Oh my god! From that moment onwards, I can’t really concentrate in my lecture. Another reason was also because I was having heavy flu. Since then, I’m prepared and ready to see any of the subject fail.
After reached home, I was so nervous and can’t wait to check for my results. I was so impatient! May be because there’re many people log into the website to check their results, so it’s hard to log in to the web page. I tried for a few times only get to log in. My results are bad although I pass all the subjects. To be honest, I quite satisfy with my results and I know what causes me can’t get A. The results are worse than the previous results. My mum was so disappointed and sad cause of I didn’t get any A.
I’m not a genius or intelligent person. So, I must work many times harder than other people to get A. It’s not an easy job. Now only I realize that I always study so hard and aim so high not only for myself but main for my parents and relatives. I don’t want to disappoint them and I don’t want to look down by other people. From an active yi yin become a passive yi yin. By staying at home study and only go out once in a blue moon.
What’s happening? I really have no idea. Aih……
Actually there’s nothing special with my first day of school. I was shocked to hear the news this early in the morning. There were 85% of students fail their FOA. How could it be? We’re accounting students and so many of them fail? Oh my god! From that moment onwards, I can’t really concentrate in my lecture. Another reason was also because I was having heavy flu. Since then, I’m prepared and ready to see any of the subject fail.
After reached home, I was so nervous and can’t wait to check for my results. I was so impatient! May be because there’re many people log into the website to check their results, so it’s hard to log in to the web page. I tried for a few times only get to log in. My results are bad although I pass all the subjects. To be honest, I quite satisfy with my results and I know what causes me can’t get A. The results are worse than the previous results. My mum was so disappointed and sad cause of I didn’t get any A.
I’m not a genius or intelligent person. So, I must work many times harder than other people to get A. It’s not an easy job. Now only I realize that I always study so hard and aim so high not only for myself but main for my parents and relatives. I don’t want to disappoint them and I don’t want to look down by other people. From an active yi yin become a passive yi yin. By staying at home study and only go out once in a blue moon.
What’s happening? I really have no idea. Aih……
Friday, February 29, 2008
~ ThInK NiCeLY BeFoRE ReAcT ~
Hey, don’t think that I’m a good person. Sometimes, I might be bad too. Now only I know one of my friend hate and angry with me so much! What I did? He said caused of I hurt him. Did I hurt him?
Actually it happened 2 years ago when I was form 5 and after my SPM. My friend like me and one day he proposed to me. But I rejected him by explained clearly to him that I put study first and I don’t want to think of other things. It’s because study is very important to me and I like it so much. Furthermore, I apologize that I really don’t have any feelings on you. May be all these words did hurt his feelings so much. From that onwards, he hates and angry with me so much!
If you really don’t like that person, I think that you should tell him/her clearly and settle it as soon as possible without dragging it. The longer u drag, he/she will like you more and once you tell the truth, you will hurt him/her feelings more. But you must always remember, if can, you try not to hurt his/her feelings when you say out your thoughts. Think properly before you react or else you will be regret. Although sometimes you might loose a friend after you tell the truth but no matter what, it’s better than letting people misunderstand and adding his/her likeness on you. Then, you will end up with hurting his/her feelings more! Care of people’s feelings and be honest in this kind of things towards everyone!
Hey, don’t think that I’m a good person. Sometimes, I might be bad too. Now only I know one of my friend hate and angry with me so much! What I did? He said caused of I hurt him. Did I hurt him?
Actually it happened 2 years ago when I was form 5 and after my SPM. My friend like me and one day he proposed to me. But I rejected him by explained clearly to him that I put study first and I don’t want to think of other things. It’s because study is very important to me and I like it so much. Furthermore, I apologize that I really don’t have any feelings on you. May be all these words did hurt his feelings so much. From that onwards, he hates and angry with me so much!
If you really don’t like that person, I think that you should tell him/her clearly and settle it as soon as possible without dragging it. The longer u drag, he/she will like you more and once you tell the truth, you will hurt him/her feelings more. But you must always remember, if can, you try not to hurt his/her feelings when you say out your thoughts. Think properly before you react or else you will be regret. Although sometimes you might loose a friend after you tell the truth but no matter what, it’s better than letting people misunderstand and adding his/her likeness on you. Then, you will end up with hurting his/her feelings more! Care of people’s feelings and be honest in this kind of things towards everyone!
Monday, February 25, 2008
~ SAD ~
Suddenly, I feel very down and moody. Wuwuwu…. I don’t want to go back to KL for school reopen on next week. I’ve no idea why I feel so. May be because I unable to put down or let go of something such as my grandparents, family and friends. I think the most that I can’t put down is my grandma. I really very scare the next time I back, I already can’t see my grandma. Honestly, I hope that she can leave earlier to heaven or another more wonderful place so that she has no longer suffered here.
Every time when I heard she screams, I feel very heartache. The louder she screams, the more I feel heartache. Furthermore, she screams because of pain especially when my mum or my uncle is helping her to wash and clean up her wounds. That’s why they will only do so when she’s sleeping. So, when she’s awake and screaming, I’ll stand by her side and tell her to sleep so that she can’t feel the pain after she sleeps soundly.
I don’t know why I’m afraid of loosing someone I love and care especially any of my family members. If my grandma pass away, I really scare that I can’t accept and face it. I don’t know what to do and how to curb and face it.
Anyway, I sure will return to KL when school reopens. I’ll study hard to pass and score my results with flying colours in this coming semester. That is also everyone hope to see and I don’t want to disappoint anyone of them.
Suddenly, I feel very down and moody. Wuwuwu…. I don’t want to go back to KL for school reopen on next week. I’ve no idea why I feel so. May be because I unable to put down or let go of something such as my grandparents, family and friends. I think the most that I can’t put down is my grandma. I really very scare the next time I back, I already can’t see my grandma. Honestly, I hope that she can leave earlier to heaven or another more wonderful place so that she has no longer suffered here.
Every time when I heard she screams, I feel very heartache. The louder she screams, the more I feel heartache. Furthermore, she screams because of pain especially when my mum or my uncle is helping her to wash and clean up her wounds. That’s why they will only do so when she’s sleeping. So, when she’s awake and screaming, I’ll stand by her side and tell her to sleep so that she can’t feel the pain after she sleeps soundly.
I don’t know why I’m afraid of loosing someone I love and care especially any of my family members. If my grandma pass away, I really scare that I can’t accept and face it. I don’t know what to do and how to curb and face it.
Anyway, I sure will return to KL when school reopens. I’ll study hard to pass and score my results with flying colours in this coming semester. That is also everyone hope to see and I don’t want to disappoint anyone of them.
Monday, February 18, 2008
~ My HoLiDaY ~
Many people must be wondering how I spend my holiday. Ok, let me share it with everyone in my blog. Actually there’s nothing special with my holiday. I spend most of my time at my grandparents’ house to help my mother and aunts. I help them to take care of my grandmother as the rest goes to school and work. While taking care of my grandparents, I also can do my own things such as blogging and watch drama.
Sometimes, if my uncle is here then my mum and I will go out for breakfast together with another aunt. Because of everyone has to take turn to stay awake every night to take care of my grandma, so mine is on Thursday, Friday and Sunday night. Although it was tiring and I’ve not enough sleep, but I’m the most free as I’m not schooling so I can help them to lighten their burden. I really look like a panda and I admit that my look during this holiday is much worse than during exam period. My eyes look tired and sleepy and could hardly open sometimes when I go out ‘yam cha’ with my friends. But I’m happy that I can do all this for my grandparents. I’m happy to take care of them.
Due to Chinese New Year, so my family and I went back to Seremban which is my dad’s hometown for 4 days 3 nights (2nd until the 5th day of CNY). It was the longest period we spent there since I was born. Normally we only back there for 3 days 2 nights and never 4 days 3 nights before. We went to Port Dickson and also Dong Zen which is a well-known temple located at Jenjarom, Banting. We went twice to the temple at night and evening. It was huge and beautiful! It full with lantern, light and also various kinds beautiful flowers! There’s nothing special at Port Dickson. It’s just a small place. But it has a beautiful beach which also can organize many water activities at there. I bought a t-shirt and a short pan while my sis bought a t-shirt and a cap. On the other hand, my dad only bought a short pan and my mum didn’t buy anything at PD. The design of the hotels there are a bit look like overseas’ building. It’s quite unique.
This CNY, I also went to ‘bai nian’ with my teachers and friends. But I unable to go all as there’re too many of them. Besides that, I also went out ‘yam cha’ with my friend if I’m free. I’ve to go no matter how tired I am because we only gather once in blue moon. We appreciate all the happy and sweet moment we get together. Our table is always the noisiest table. We laugh and talk very loud and sometimes even over excited. Wakaka……really miss those crazy days in primary and secondary school! I’ll visit my teachers in school soon.
I think that’s all for my holidays! I enjoy it so much! It’s much more meaningful than my school holidays last time. It passes so fast and half month had gone! I can’t wait for school reopen and starts with the 3rd semester. I miss study so much! May be because the more I grow the more I like to study. I also don’t know why. Haha…….
Many people must be wondering how I spend my holiday. Ok, let me share it with everyone in my blog. Actually there’s nothing special with my holiday. I spend most of my time at my grandparents’ house to help my mother and aunts. I help them to take care of my grandmother as the rest goes to school and work. While taking care of my grandparents, I also can do my own things such as blogging and watch drama.
Sometimes, if my uncle is here then my mum and I will go out for breakfast together with another aunt. Because of everyone has to take turn to stay awake every night to take care of my grandma, so mine is on Thursday, Friday and Sunday night. Although it was tiring and I’ve not enough sleep, but I’m the most free as I’m not schooling so I can help them to lighten their burden. I really look like a panda and I admit that my look during this holiday is much worse than during exam period. My eyes look tired and sleepy and could hardly open sometimes when I go out ‘yam cha’ with my friends. But I’m happy that I can do all this for my grandparents. I’m happy to take care of them.
Due to Chinese New Year, so my family and I went back to Seremban which is my dad’s hometown for 4 days 3 nights (2nd until the 5th day of CNY). It was the longest period we spent there since I was born. Normally we only back there for 3 days 2 nights and never 4 days 3 nights before. We went to Port Dickson and also Dong Zen which is a well-known temple located at Jenjarom, Banting. We went twice to the temple at night and evening. It was huge and beautiful! It full with lantern, light and also various kinds beautiful flowers! There’s nothing special at Port Dickson. It’s just a small place. But it has a beautiful beach which also can organize many water activities at there. I bought a t-shirt and a short pan while my sis bought a t-shirt and a cap. On the other hand, my dad only bought a short pan and my mum didn’t buy anything at PD. The design of the hotels there are a bit look like overseas’ building. It’s quite unique.
This CNY, I also went to ‘bai nian’ with my teachers and friends. But I unable to go all as there’re too many of them. Besides that, I also went out ‘yam cha’ with my friend if I’m free. I’ve to go no matter how tired I am because we only gather once in blue moon. We appreciate all the happy and sweet moment we get together. Our table is always the noisiest table. We laugh and talk very loud and sometimes even over excited. Wakaka……really miss those crazy days in primary and secondary school! I’ll visit my teachers in school soon.
I think that’s all for my holidays! I enjoy it so much! It’s much more meaningful than my school holidays last time. It passes so fast and half month had gone! I can’t wait for school reopen and starts with the 3rd semester. I miss study so much! May be because the more I grow the more I like to study. I also don’t know why. Haha…….
Sunday, February 17, 2008
~ PiTY LiTTLe PuPPy ~
this is the cute little puppy!
Bang! There it left us and goes to heaven! “It” is refers to a cute and playful little puppy which crashed by a car and died after a few minutes just now. Some of us had expected this will happened one day as the puppy likes to follow anyone or cars until the road side then only it’ll ran back to my grandparents’ house again. Sometimes, it even followed us to cross the busy road in front of my grandparents’ house without notice it. for example, this morning when my mum and I were crossing road to the opposite shop lots to wait for my aunt and it followed us across the road until the double line in the middle of the road and in a sudden it turned back and returned back to the house. It scared us! Luckily, nothing happened at that moment.
The puppy was adapted by my cousin sister 3 weeks ago. How it came? Actually, this puppy was outside my uncle’s house for a night already. The next morning when my cousin brother and his friends were cycling around his neighborhood, the puppy kept following them. Then, my cousin returned to his home and asked her mum, “what to do with the dog?” Her mum told him to send it over to my grandparents’ house for my cousin sister as she likes dog so much! So, the puppy followed at the back of my cousin while he’s cycling and lead it the way to my grandparents’ house. There’s the day my cousin sister started to adapt it and she named it “Baby”. She loves it so much! She even bath together with it in the bathroom sometimes, carries it and plays with it everyday.
I was in the bathroom. Suddenly, I heard someone was crying. I wonder what’s happening. So, I wore my clothes very fast and rushed out from the bathroom. Then, only I knew that the puppy had passed away. My cousin sister burst into tears and she was so sad and had cried for a few hours. When her parents back, they were shocked to see their own daughter cried till so loud. After they make things clear, then my uncle dig a big and deep hole in one of the part of the house and my aunt helped to carry the dog to the place and buried it. It was not scary either although was at night. Quite a number of us send it the last journey. My sis also cried.
After that, my dad only told me that actually the dog was following him across the road without his notices, and then it ran back to the roadside again. After my dad entered the shop, he heard a loud sound, bang! The sound was came from the roadside, he ran out the shop immediately and he saw a car drove away with a high speed and the puppy was lying on the roadside outside the house. Luckily there’s no more car on the road. Without hesitation, my dad quickly ran across the road and carried the dog back to the house before any car went over it. At first, the puppy was still moving. But after a few minutes, it stopped breathing and died. Although I not really like the puppy as I afraid of dog and this playful puppy always wants to run towards me and make me scream and shout for help. But I also feel sad and sorry to hear so. Hey doggy, wish you will live happily in heaven!
Life is short! Nobody knows what will happen in the next second. So, appreciate and be happy with everything you’re having now before it’s too late!
~ HaPPy BiRthDaY GrAnDPa ~
Yummy~ It's my grandpa's birthday cake from secret recipe!
my grandpa and his birthday cake.....Happy Birthday,Grandpa!!
There're 9 big candles which means it's my grandpa's 90 years old birthday!
haha....my aunt was helping my grandpa to blow off the candle
Wooow.....finally is time for my grandpa to cut his lovely birthday cake!
But it doesn’t matter because those who in Kuantan celebrated with him. I’m glad to see that he so happy! They bought a cake from secret recipe, fried noodles, fried rice and also the best sate from Satay Zul. I not really know how they celebrate my grandpa’s birthday but I still can briefly describe it.
This time is different than previous years as they only celebrate with grandpa at home. Previously, we celebrated with him in a big room of the hotel call M.S.Garden. We even sing karaoke there. After the dinner, everyone will return to my grandparents’ house to wish my grandpa and take ‘ang pau’ from him. Furthermore, I also sing 2 teow chew songs to my grandpa after reached home. The song I sing are ‘sai gue jo ni gio jo tembikai’ (why watermelon call tembikai?) and ‘ah gong deng sua lai’.
This time they only celebrated at home as my grandma in a bad condition. Early in the morning, everyone who went to my grandparents’ house had to eat noodles and eggs with sweet soup. It’s a teow chew tradition since last time. The soup is tastes sweet. At night, they only ate dinner and sang birthday song. Then, they also got wish and took ‘ang pau’ from my grandpa. Although was just a simple birthday celebration for my grandpa but he already very happy. Everyone also satisfy and very happy! =)
Friday, February 15, 2008
~ PrOuD & ImPreSS~
Hey, you are really a brave girl! I really impress and proud of you! You know what? You get to do many things that other girls can’t or hard to do. It’s so hard for you to get into hot temper. You like to always be yourself! You like to cold joke or joke with your friends! Whenever your friends need your help, you sure will be there for help and always try your best to do so!
Sometimes, you are too kind until some of them bully or take advantage on you. But you also hardly get angry with them and you still will help them. Although sometime I really very angry with them who over act and take advantage on me but no matter what, sometime is my responsibility as printing manager to do so. And sometimes, I think helping friends can bring happiness to them and that is friends are for. Human should help each other when whoever faces problem. You’ll sure very happy after helping someone. When her friends down, she’ll console them and give them some advice and also some humble opinion. She always gives her fully support to her family and friends!
This girl, help everyone with her true heart without hoping or asking for any return from anyone. Sometimes, she’s really mad of those friends who give so many excuses and refuse to help her, then, she chooses to settle it by herself! But she no longer mad of her friends as she thinks that we’re friends forever and it doesn’t matter that you all help or not. As long as everyone happy then anything will do!
She’s easily to forgive a person. However, she hates to live in a problematic family. But she still chooses to forgive her parents for always complaint their problems to her and also making her a middle person between to of them. She forgives them because she thinks that no matter what happen, they still a family. Furthermore, this girl always hopes for a peaceful and happy family. Although can’t really fulfill her wish but she’s trying her best all the time to settle her family’s problems. Sometimes, she able to reduce her parents tempers and makes them laugh again and so everything settles peacefully! She forgive her friends easily too! This shows that this girl likes peaceful so much! Peace!
She remembers there’s once her mother talk bad and step her by using those hurtful sentences and words in front of her younger sister. At that moment, this girl didn’t argue back with her mother but she felt like there’s a sharp knife poke into her heart and was so painful! She thought that how could a mother say her daughter like this, it’s unfair and hurtful! The second day, she told her grandma and her grandma console her and said, “Don’t care what your mother said! The most important is you work hard and prove to her that she’s wrong and you can do it!” The girl felt very touch and warm at that moment as she still has grandmother’s love.
To be honest, her grandma loves her so much since small. When she’s tiny little baby that time, whenever her grandma saw she’s not feeling well and none stop crying, she’ll follow she cry as well. She always cooks her granddaughter’s favorite dishes for her. Of course, her granddaughter loves her too! Actually after her granddaughter went to study in KL, she planed to learn to cook better and once she back, she wants to cook for her grandma. But it’s too late! Before she gets back, her grandma already get stroke and paralyze. In this case, her grandma only can drink milk by pouring the milk bit by bit through the tube. She’s having wound over her whole body. It’s very pain! Every night there’s people to take turn to stay awake the whole night to take care of grandma. She really misses those happy and sweet moments with her grandma. Although she studies in KL but once she’s free or holidays, she’ll sure return home to help her mother to take care of her grandma and also stay awake the whole night for help. Although is very tiring but she’s happy of doing all this too! She rather spends her precious time with her family than other things before it’s too late and she doesn’t want to be regret in the future! The words “Family first” always appears in her mind. And these two words were taught by one her senior. This senior makes her realize that family is always come first and they’re very important to us! Without their support, we can’t able to be success!
This girl doesn’t care much of her outlook because she always thinks that inner beauty is the most important among the whole person! A person who looks pretty or handsome but if he/she doesn’t have inner beauty also no use. Moreover, the most important is a person’s attitude. That’s why she doesn’t care much about her dressing.
Besides, this girl also noob in doing something sometime. Although people think that she’s noob, but she’s happy and know what she’s doing so she doesn’t care of how people treat or look at her. Sometimes, she’s quite blur too! But she’s very serious when she’s studying until forget about her hungriness and also ignore people around her. Haha….finally this is one of her bad habit that also makes her parents worry that she’ll over study!
Although this girl faces a lot of pressure such as stress in study and also family problem but she’s brave and she face it! And every time she gets to overcome it by herself! She’ll never easily give up!
Last but not least, I would like to say that this girl is me! Do you agree?
Hey, you are really a brave girl! I really impress and proud of you! You know what? You get to do many things that other girls can’t or hard to do. It’s so hard for you to get into hot temper. You like to always be yourself! You like to cold joke or joke with your friends! Whenever your friends need your help, you sure will be there for help and always try your best to do so!
Sometimes, you are too kind until some of them bully or take advantage on you. But you also hardly get angry with them and you still will help them. Although sometime I really very angry with them who over act and take advantage on me but no matter what, sometime is my responsibility as printing manager to do so. And sometimes, I think helping friends can bring happiness to them and that is friends are for. Human should help each other when whoever faces problem. You’ll sure very happy after helping someone. When her friends down, she’ll console them and give them some advice and also some humble opinion. She always gives her fully support to her family and friends!
This girl, help everyone with her true heart without hoping or asking for any return from anyone. Sometimes, she’s really mad of those friends who give so many excuses and refuse to help her, then, she chooses to settle it by herself! But she no longer mad of her friends as she thinks that we’re friends forever and it doesn’t matter that you all help or not. As long as everyone happy then anything will do!
She’s easily to forgive a person. However, she hates to live in a problematic family. But she still chooses to forgive her parents for always complaint their problems to her and also making her a middle person between to of them. She forgives them because she thinks that no matter what happen, they still a family. Furthermore, this girl always hopes for a peaceful and happy family. Although can’t really fulfill her wish but she’s trying her best all the time to settle her family’s problems. Sometimes, she able to reduce her parents tempers and makes them laugh again and so everything settles peacefully! She forgive her friends easily too! This shows that this girl likes peaceful so much! Peace!
She remembers there’s once her mother talk bad and step her by using those hurtful sentences and words in front of her younger sister. At that moment, this girl didn’t argue back with her mother but she felt like there’s a sharp knife poke into her heart and was so painful! She thought that how could a mother say her daughter like this, it’s unfair and hurtful! The second day, she told her grandma and her grandma console her and said, “Don’t care what your mother said! The most important is you work hard and prove to her that she’s wrong and you can do it!” The girl felt very touch and warm at that moment as she still has grandmother’s love.
To be honest, her grandma loves her so much since small. When she’s tiny little baby that time, whenever her grandma saw she’s not feeling well and none stop crying, she’ll follow she cry as well. She always cooks her granddaughter’s favorite dishes for her. Of course, her granddaughter loves her too! Actually after her granddaughter went to study in KL, she planed to learn to cook better and once she back, she wants to cook for her grandma. But it’s too late! Before she gets back, her grandma already get stroke and paralyze. In this case, her grandma only can drink milk by pouring the milk bit by bit through the tube. She’s having wound over her whole body. It’s very pain! Every night there’s people to take turn to stay awake the whole night to take care of grandma. She really misses those happy and sweet moments with her grandma. Although she studies in KL but once she’s free or holidays, she’ll sure return home to help her mother to take care of her grandma and also stay awake the whole night for help. Although is very tiring but she’s happy of doing all this too! She rather spends her precious time with her family than other things before it’s too late and she doesn’t want to be regret in the future! The words “Family first” always appears in her mind. And these two words were taught by one her senior. This senior makes her realize that family is always come first and they’re very important to us! Without their support, we can’t able to be success!
This girl doesn’t care much of her outlook because she always thinks that inner beauty is the most important among the whole person! A person who looks pretty or handsome but if he/she doesn’t have inner beauty also no use. Moreover, the most important is a person’s attitude. That’s why she doesn’t care much about her dressing.
Besides, this girl also noob in doing something sometime. Although people think that she’s noob, but she’s happy and know what she’s doing so she doesn’t care of how people treat or look at her. Sometimes, she’s quite blur too! But she’s very serious when she’s studying until forget about her hungriness and also ignore people around her. Haha….finally this is one of her bad habit that also makes her parents worry that she’ll over study!
Although this girl faces a lot of pressure such as stress in study and also family problem but she’s brave and she face it! And every time she gets to overcome it by herself! She’ll never easily give up!
Last but not least, I would like to say that this girl is me! Do you agree?
~ FaCe It ~
Before my sister back from tuition, I was still thinking of want to go for my friend’s birthday party or not. At first, I already set up my mind and didn’t want to go. The reason of I’m not going because I know that they sure will mentioned about him. And I really don’t hope to hear any of my friend mention or ask about him anymore. Because he’s over my mind everyday and I’m controlling myself not to message or even talk to him until he message or talk to me first. To be honest, to let so of someone is extremely hard! But don’t worry, I’m trying my best to do so! At last, I choose to go to the party and I’m not scared anymore! Cause I choose to face it! You can do it, girl! I believe one day you sure able to get rid of all this!
I really don’t know what’s going on among us. I feel like our distance is getting further and further. I don’t understand why all this happen! I thought we still can chat like last time and as good as last time like normal friend. But not anymore! Why? Why? Why?
Can’t you just treat me as normal friend? I know you afraid that I’ll misunderstand. But of course not! I won’t misunderstand! You’re just a friend of mine that I can always talk to and I treat you as my good friend.
Our friendship really have to become worse just because of little thing happen? I don’t mind of sacrificing my happiness or anything just to let everyone happy always. I hope to see smiley face from everybody in every single day. Then, I’ll sure be very happy no matter what happen! Don’t worry! I’ll sure be tough! You happy or sad also the will day like that, so why don’t you choose to be happy everyday, right? So, I choose to be happy and cheerful everyday so that I can brighten everyone with my laughter. That’s me! Yeah! I must do it!
Before my sister back from tuition, I was still thinking of want to go for my friend’s birthday party or not. At first, I already set up my mind and didn’t want to go. The reason of I’m not going because I know that they sure will mentioned about him. And I really don’t hope to hear any of my friend mention or ask about him anymore. Because he’s over my mind everyday and I’m controlling myself not to message or even talk to him until he message or talk to me first. To be honest, to let so of someone is extremely hard! But don’t worry, I’m trying my best to do so! At last, I choose to go to the party and I’m not scared anymore! Cause I choose to face it! You can do it, girl! I believe one day you sure able to get rid of all this!
I really don’t know what’s going on among us. I feel like our distance is getting further and further. I don’t understand why all this happen! I thought we still can chat like last time and as good as last time like normal friend. But not anymore! Why? Why? Why?
Can’t you just treat me as normal friend? I know you afraid that I’ll misunderstand. But of course not! I won’t misunderstand! You’re just a friend of mine that I can always talk to and I treat you as my good friend.
Our friendship really have to become worse just because of little thing happen? I don’t mind of sacrificing my happiness or anything just to let everyone happy always. I hope to see smiley face from everybody in every single day. Then, I’ll sure be very happy no matter what happen! Don’t worry! I’ll sure be tough! You happy or sad also the will day like that, so why don’t you choose to be happy everyday, right? So, I choose to be happy and cheerful everyday so that I can brighten everyone with my laughter. That’s me! Yeah! I must do it!
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
~ ArE FRiEnDs ImPoRTanT? ~
Friends are also played important part in our life other than our family. You may make friends with everyone around the world but not everyone get to become your friend. Why? Some people believe that becoming friend is also depends on fate. Are friends important? Of course! You try to ask yourself, “can you live alone without friends and family?” I believe there’ll be at least 80% or more people say no! No one can live alone in this world. It’s because human also afraid of loneliness and bored.
Friends are also about trust. Without trustworthy among friends, conflict such as misunderstand, quarrel or even fight among each other will happen. Moreover, honesty is the key for any relationships. It’s also important between friends. When you tell lie and you drag it and refuse to tell the truth, one day when your friend finds out, things will become worse. All these will cause no longer friendship.
At home, you have your family help and support but you’re out in the society, you’ll need your friend’s help and support. A friend in need is a friend indeed. When you’re sad or down, you’ll hope that there’s someone beside you to console you or when you’ve any problem, you may express it to your friend or ask for their help. A true friend will always beside you whenever you need him/her by consoling you, giving his/her full support to you and also helping you.
Actually helping your friends, not only can bring happiness to them but also yourself too. The moment they appreciate your help and say thanks to you is the happiest moment because you get to help a person that need your help. However, not everything you can help, sometime you can only try your best to console them and be with them when they need you. Although you can’t help much but don’t feel bad for it. It’s because at least you did try your best and do whatever you can and the rest is depends on his/her own will to stand up again.
Everyone sure will experience falls or fail in their life for at least one time. Some of them choose to end their life by commit suicide because they afraid to face it. And don’t get influence by devil! You must always remember there’s always hope! Tomorrow will be better than today! Never mind if you fail once. The most important is you must be brave! Face it and don’t try to avoid from it! Because if you avoid it, you’ll only make yourself suffer and your problem will not solve forever. So, you must keep on trying to find the problem out and solve it! This will be the day you get to stand up again. I believe that not only you will feel proud of yourself for this, people around you will sure feel proud of you too.
Friends are also played important part in our life other than our family. You may make friends with everyone around the world but not everyone get to become your friend. Why? Some people believe that becoming friend is also depends on fate. Are friends important? Of course! You try to ask yourself, “can you live alone without friends and family?” I believe there’ll be at least 80% or more people say no! No one can live alone in this world. It’s because human also afraid of loneliness and bored.
Friends are also about trust. Without trustworthy among friends, conflict such as misunderstand, quarrel or even fight among each other will happen. Moreover, honesty is the key for any relationships. It’s also important between friends. When you tell lie and you drag it and refuse to tell the truth, one day when your friend finds out, things will become worse. All these will cause no longer friendship.
At home, you have your family help and support but you’re out in the society, you’ll need your friend’s help and support. A friend in need is a friend indeed. When you’re sad or down, you’ll hope that there’s someone beside you to console you or when you’ve any problem, you may express it to your friend or ask for their help. A true friend will always beside you whenever you need him/her by consoling you, giving his/her full support to you and also helping you.
Actually helping your friends, not only can bring happiness to them but also yourself too. The moment they appreciate your help and say thanks to you is the happiest moment because you get to help a person that need your help. However, not everything you can help, sometime you can only try your best to console them and be with them when they need you. Although you can’t help much but don’t feel bad for it. It’s because at least you did try your best and do whatever you can and the rest is depends on his/her own will to stand up again.
Everyone sure will experience falls or fail in their life for at least one time. Some of them choose to end their life by commit suicide because they afraid to face it. And don’t get influence by devil! You must always remember there’s always hope! Tomorrow will be better than today! Never mind if you fail once. The most important is you must be brave! Face it and don’t try to avoid from it! Because if you avoid it, you’ll only make yourself suffer and your problem will not solve forever. So, you must keep on trying to find the problem out and solve it! This will be the day you get to stand up again. I believe that not only you will feel proud of yourself for this, people around you will sure feel proud of you too.
Thursday, February 07, 2008
~ ReUNiON DiNNeR ~
dishes ready for reunion dinner
everyone is waiting for dinner!
dishes ready for reunion dinnereveryone is waiting for dinner!
yahoo! Let the dinner begin!
Actually this year is a bit different from previous year as it never happened before. The reunion dinner this year was without my grandmother. To be honest, we were quite sad of it. We had taken some photos of the dishes we ate tonight. There's around 9 or 10 dishes on the table and 26 persons include me. But this year didn't have homemade shark fin and most of the dishes such as duck and chicken were bought from outside. Overall we enjoyed the dinner and it was quite delicious.
After the dinner, I went to my grandmother and felt so heartache and pity to see her like that. I felt like crying when I see her and really can feel that she's suffering. And this year some of my uncles n aunties not going out to 'bai nian' with others as my grandmother like that.
After the dinner, I went to my grandmother and felt so heartache and pity to see her like that. I felt like crying when I see her and really can feel that she's suffering. And this year some of my uncles n aunties not going out to 'bai nian' with others as my grandmother like that.
the Telok Chempedak Beach in Kuantan,Pahang!
playing with cousins and uncle :)
Soon, my uncle brought us to Hyatt Hotel nearby the beach. It really recalled back all our childhood. When we were small, my 3rd uncle and my another uncle like to bring us go to the beach. And the behind seats were filled with 6 or 7 or even 8 children and another 1 or 2 of them sit at the front seat excluded the driver seat. It was fun! The whole gang of us really crazy when we all get together. As time passes, all has grown up. So,the car only can fit in 6 person at the behind seats and 1 person at the front seat. Then, we went to the playground at the hotel and we played swings and also see saw. We were trying to balance the see saw and add more people at both side. My uncle also join us too. It was really fun and happy time together.
my cute & handsome ah gong was waiting for us to collect 'ang pau'
we were lining up to collect the 'ang pau'
Wow! Finally is my turn to take 'ang pau'!
After we back, it was time for us to received angpao from my grandpa. Yeah! We queue up to take the angpao but before that, we must wish our grandpa by saying, "sing jia ju yi" (in teow chiew). wakaka.........
What happen to this dead fly? haha....I've no idea
When clock's strike 12am, we wear new shoes to go out for a walk to 'cai xiao ren'. Because they believe that after doing so then the whole year will not have anyone who do bad or talk bad behind you. It's not working sometime. haha........anyway I wish everyone Happy Rat Year! Enjoy holidays and Chinese New Year!
Wednesday, February 06, 2008
~ BuSY DaY ~
It's a fun, busy and tiring day. Everyone was busy playing their own role. But i was spending my whole morning to watch drama. Then, we only started to work during afternoon after everyone had back from school and it was thier last day of school before Chinese New Year. My cousins and my sis were having fun washing the floor outside as they were playing water too and i was wrapping 'wan tan' for our dinner. On the other hand, my mum washed the kitchen and my aunt clean up stairs. I could hear the laughter and happiness from everyone. Although we were tiring but we're enjoying too. Furthermore, I also moved my plant to a bigger pot.
After that, my sis helped to cook 'wan tan' for us. Again my grandpa went to my grandma and kept asking her, " have you eaten your dinner?" Unfortunately, my grandma couldn't answer him as she can't talk but she did stare at him. My grandparents' relationship really extremely good. Nowadays, it's hardly to see couples like that anymore.
Haha...my little cousin cried after her 'wan tan' was eaten by the naughty dog. Then, she wanted to pour the whole bowl but her sis said nevermind and let her eat. wakaka.....
It's a fun, busy and tiring day. Everyone was busy playing their own role. But i was spending my whole morning to watch drama. Then, we only started to work during afternoon after everyone had back from school and it was thier last day of school before Chinese New Year. My cousins and my sis were having fun washing the floor outside as they were playing water too and i was wrapping 'wan tan' for our dinner. On the other hand, my mum washed the kitchen and my aunt clean up stairs. I could hear the laughter and happiness from everyone. Although we were tiring but we're enjoying too. Furthermore, I also moved my plant to a bigger pot.
After that, my sis helped to cook 'wan tan' for us. Again my grandpa went to my grandma and kept asking her, " have you eaten your dinner?" Unfortunately, my grandma couldn't answer him as she can't talk but she did stare at him. My grandparents' relationship really extremely good. Nowadays, it's hardly to see couples like that anymore.
Haha...my little cousin cried after her 'wan tan' was eaten by the naughty dog. Then, she wanted to pour the whole bowl but her sis said nevermind and let her eat. wakaka.....
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
~ PaIN & HeaRTacHe~
This morning, I was called by my mother to lend my hand to her and a nurse to change urine tube for my grandmother. All I did is just hold the torchlight and I aim the light to my grandma’s private part. Oh my god! I don’t know why I feel so dizzy and disgusting suddenly of watching it. Actually the nurse was poking the urine tube into my grandma’s private part. It was so pain. And I really impress the nurse. At first, the nurse wore handgloves then she pulled my grandma's private part wider so that she could see the hole clearly and poke the urine tube into it.I don’t know how they able to do such thing. I just hold the torchlight and closed my eyes as I couldn’t stand it.
Although my grandma had no feeling but I could feel the pain of hers. It’s like something sharp poke into your private part. The nurse kept poking the urine tube into my grandma’s private part and pulled out again as she poked into the wrong part until she saw the urine flow from the tube. I really feel very heartache of seeing that. And my grandma is really suffering.
I hope she can go earlier so that she doesn’t need to suffer for so long. Cause she also won’t want to be like that and that is not what she hopes for. Actually she told us before that she just hope to go peacefully. So, I always pray that she won’t suffer for so long and can leave this world earlier.
This morning, I was called by my mother to lend my hand to her and a nurse to change urine tube for my grandmother. All I did is just hold the torchlight and I aim the light to my grandma’s private part. Oh my god! I don’t know why I feel so dizzy and disgusting suddenly of watching it. Actually the nurse was poking the urine tube into my grandma’s private part. It was so pain. And I really impress the nurse. At first, the nurse wore handgloves then she pulled my grandma's private part wider so that she could see the hole clearly and poke the urine tube into it.I don’t know how they able to do such thing. I just hold the torchlight and closed my eyes as I couldn’t stand it.
Although my grandma had no feeling but I could feel the pain of hers. It’s like something sharp poke into your private part. The nurse kept poking the urine tube into my grandma’s private part and pulled out again as she poked into the wrong part until she saw the urine flow from the tube. I really feel very heartache of seeing that. And my grandma is really suffering.
I hope she can go earlier so that she doesn’t need to suffer for so long. Cause she also won’t want to be like that and that is not what she hopes for. Actually she told us before that she just hope to go peacefully. So, I always pray that she won’t suffer for so long and can leave this world earlier.
Monday, February 04, 2008
~ Beware of people around you ~
Who we’ve to beware of? Friends or family members? Of course anyone will do. Why? It’s because people around you even your friends and relatives, they may also talk about your bad and even betray you. As a results, the best is trust yourself and not others!
Sometimes, they even send to wrong message to others and cause many troubles. It may cause misunderstanding among your friends and will quarrel among each other. It’s very serious as sometime will affect the friendships and even lose your best friend.
When it happen? It happened especially when there’s appearance of third party. This third party will sometime misunderstand cause of he or she doesn’t really know what’s happening between two of you. Moreover, it happen also because the person involve send the wrong message to the third party and cause all the misunderstanding and make the whole situation worse.
To be honest, I really hate that kind of people. I don’t understand why they want to do so since I didn’t do anything wrong to them. In my opinion, no matter what happen, the best way to settle is just settle between two of them without involve any third party.
Honesty is the key of any relationship. Similarly, trust is also the key of any relationship. If there’s no trust between two parties, it means there’s meaningless of becoming friends anymore. In another words, we should trust our friends and family. I believe that there’s always hope! So, don’t give up easily. For example, if you didn’t do anything wrong and nobody trust you, then, you should think of some way to prove to everyone that you are right and is not your fault. You should explain to them. And do something so that they trust you again. Action is always better than do nothing.
Actually do you know that you really disappoint me? You rather trust a person that you just knew a month ago than trusting me since that you’ve know me more than half a year. What kind of people is this? Lack of trust between us. In addition, she also always tell you the wrong thing and causes many of misunderstand among us. I really don’t understand what’s the purpose of she doing so. Forgive and forget. As long as I’m not that kind of person, I don’t mind what you think or say. But the whole world can misunderstand me except for you (N) and my family! You all shouldn’t misunderstand me! It’s just a matter of trust among people. So, to avoid from all this happen again, I'll be more aware of people around me.
If left me alone in the house which means everyone already return to their hometown, will anyone accompany me? Of course the actual answer is NO! NO! NO! Likewise, when I need help, will anyone help me? The answer is also NO! NO! NO! So, you better don’t hope for anything as it’s hopeless! Why are all this happened on me? Why me? I also don’t know the reasons behind. It’ll be ok for me as I’ve already experience the same things for so many years.
But I sure will help whoever who ask for my help no matter how they treat me and did to me before. I don’t mind of what had happened previously. A friend in need is a friend indeed. That’s me! This is one of my personality. I feel proud of myself! My mother always say, “don’t care or mind of how people treat you but the most important is how you treat people.”
Who we’ve to beware of? Friends or family members? Of course anyone will do. Why? It’s because people around you even your friends and relatives, they may also talk about your bad and even betray you. As a results, the best is trust yourself and not others!
Sometimes, they even send to wrong message to others and cause many troubles. It may cause misunderstanding among your friends and will quarrel among each other. It’s very serious as sometime will affect the friendships and even lose your best friend.
When it happen? It happened especially when there’s appearance of third party. This third party will sometime misunderstand cause of he or she doesn’t really know what’s happening between two of you. Moreover, it happen also because the person involve send the wrong message to the third party and cause all the misunderstanding and make the whole situation worse.
To be honest, I really hate that kind of people. I don’t understand why they want to do so since I didn’t do anything wrong to them. In my opinion, no matter what happen, the best way to settle is just settle between two of them without involve any third party.
Honesty is the key of any relationship. Similarly, trust is also the key of any relationship. If there’s no trust between two parties, it means there’s meaningless of becoming friends anymore. In another words, we should trust our friends and family. I believe that there’s always hope! So, don’t give up easily. For example, if you didn’t do anything wrong and nobody trust you, then, you should think of some way to prove to everyone that you are right and is not your fault. You should explain to them. And do something so that they trust you again. Action is always better than do nothing.
Actually do you know that you really disappoint me? You rather trust a person that you just knew a month ago than trusting me since that you’ve know me more than half a year. What kind of people is this? Lack of trust between us. In addition, she also always tell you the wrong thing and causes many of misunderstand among us. I really don’t understand what’s the purpose of she doing so. Forgive and forget. As long as I’m not that kind of person, I don’t mind what you think or say. But the whole world can misunderstand me except for you (N) and my family! You all shouldn’t misunderstand me! It’s just a matter of trust among people. So, to avoid from all this happen again, I'll be more aware of people around me.
If left me alone in the house which means everyone already return to their hometown, will anyone accompany me? Of course the actual answer is NO! NO! NO! Likewise, when I need help, will anyone help me? The answer is also NO! NO! NO! So, you better don’t hope for anything as it’s hopeless! Why are all this happened on me? Why me? I also don’t know the reasons behind. It’ll be ok for me as I’ve already experience the same things for so many years.
But I sure will help whoever who ask for my help no matter how they treat me and did to me before. I don’t mind of what had happened previously. A friend in need is a friend indeed. That’s me! This is one of my personality. I feel proud of myself! My mother always say, “don’t care or mind of how people treat you but the most important is how you treat people.”
Sunday, February 03, 2008
~ Lie ~
Psychologists who study deception, though, are quick to warn that there is no foolproof method. Bella DePaulo, a visiting professor of psychology at the University of California, Santa Barbara, writes that “lying is not a distinct psychological process with its own unique behavioral indicators. It does matter how liars feel and how they think.” Indeed, many of the tell-tale signs common to liars, like fidgeting and sweating, can also be signs of ordinary anxiety. It’s tough to tell the difference between a liar and an honest person who happens to be under a lot of stress.
Why they want to tell lie? A person tell lie is because he or she wants to hide something from others. Or may be because they want to protect themselves or they afraid that they will cause trouble after telling the truth. The person, however, who seems to feel compelled to lie about both the small and large stuff has a problem. We often call these folks pathological liars (which is a description, not a diagnosis). They lie to protect themselves, look good, gain financially or socially and avoid punishment.
Psychologists who study deception, though, are quick to warn that there is no foolproof method. Bella DePaulo, a visiting professor of psychology at the University of California, Santa Barbara, writes that “lying is not a distinct psychological process with its own unique behavioral indicators. It does matter how liars feel and how they think.” Indeed, many of the tell-tale signs common to liars, like fidgeting and sweating, can also be signs of ordinary anxiety. It’s tough to tell the difference between a liar and an honest person who happens to be under a lot of stress.
Why they want to tell lie? A person tell lie is because he or she wants to hide something from others. Or may be because they want to protect themselves or they afraid that they will cause trouble after telling the truth. The person, however, who seems to feel compelled to lie about both the small and large stuff has a problem. We often call these folks pathological liars (which is a description, not a diagnosis). They lie to protect themselves, look good, gain financially or socially and avoid punishment.
I hate people tell lie! Why do we dislike liars, especially sociopaths, so much? It’s a matter of trust. When a person lies, they have broken a bond – an unspoken agreement to treat others as we would like to be treated.
Clues of people tell lie :
1) Avoidance of eye contact : Usually someone makes eye contact at least half the time they are talking to you. If you notice them avoiding eye contact or looking down during a specific part of a conversation, they may well be lying.
2) Change of voice : A variation in pitch of voice or rate of speech can be a sign of lying. So can lots of umms and ahhs.
3) Body language : Turning your body away, covering your face or mouth, a lot of fidgeting of hands or legs can indicate deception.
4) Contradicting yourself : Making statements that just don’t hold together should make you suspicious.
Reasons of people tell lie :
1) Fear of harm : The easiest reason to understand why we lie is for self protection, including self deception, to prevent harm to ourselves. This harm can be either physical or mental.
2) Fear of conflict : To some degree, we all fear having an argument.
3) Fear of punishment : When growing up, how often did we lie about how well we did in school, or who started a fight? How often do we cover up our mistakes and transgressions?
4) Fear of rejection : Sometimes, our insecurities are the foundation of why we lie to each other, because we want to be remain popular in our relationships. Typically, it is harmless boasting to make ourselves appear more admirable to other people.
5) Fear of loss : This is usually the loss of personal objects, such as money or expensive valuables. Greed is the foundation for this reason and can be found in each of us. We often lie to make ourselves more desirable to other people too. Most common, people lie for fear of losing an opportunity to have sex. Other times, when our self esteem starts to decline, we even lie to ourselves as means to prevent loss of morale.
6) Altruistic Reasons : We often lie to help our friends and loved ones. How often do we flattery someone just to make them feel better? This is the only selfless reason why we lie.
6) Altruistic Reasons : We often lie to help our friends and loved ones. How often do we flattery someone just to make them feel better? This is the only selfless reason why we lie.
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